Most of the time I write about sewing and when I get back to my own house, I will continue talking about sewing because I am having major sewing withdrawals right now! Believe me, I have needed to engage in some major sewing therapy just to relieve all the stress of this particular journey that I’ve been on recently.
I’ve mentioned before that I absolutely hate to travel and there is a very good reason for that. Most of the reason that I truly hate traveling anymore is that there never seems to be time to enjoy the journey. We always seem to be in “get there” mode and that leaves very little time to stop and admire some of the beautiful scenery of that particular geographical area. With this trip, there was a deadline for arriving at our first destination because of the holidays. (Need I even mention that as much as I hate to travel, I especially hate to travel during the holidays!)
Just after the holidays were over, we continued our journey to our final destination which was California. My youngest daughter will be spending her last semester in college in this area. Too many people have mistakenly thought that this journey was a vacation, but nothing could be further from the truth. This was more of a “business trip” and as such, that left little time for sight seeing or just slowing down–until today.
Today was the only day that there were no college orientation events and so there was time to just slow down and relax. However, it seems that every minute of every day has been planned and once again, there is very little time to enjoy the journey. On this particular morning, I overslept because I seem to be getting lots of help in not getting into bed at a reasonable hour.
Several members of the family were going in one direction and others were going in another direction. I really wanted to go on one of the sightseeing trips, but because I overslept, I didn’t get to go on this particular jaunt, and this was something I had really wanted to do–and thought I had made that clear. Yes, it was my fault that I overslept, and I realize that, but what upsets me is that my voice never seems to be heard–and more importantly–understood. One person in my family seems to have difficulty in understanding what I’m trying to communicate and that tends to keep me in a constant state of frustration. I speak; I voice my opinions; and I try to make sure that I communicate as clearly as possible, but for some reason, it seems that my family just doesn’t understand. For a number of years now, I have felt that my words are not valued or deemed important enough to listen to or pay attention to by some members of my family–and that is beyond frustrating to me. Words are important and should be valued. While this may seem like I”m having a bit of a “pity party” (and maybe I am, although that’s not really my intention), this blog and other online areas are the only places where I feel that my words are actually heard and valued. Feeling heard and understood is very important to me, and I suspect that I’m not the only person who feels as if their voice isn’t heard and understood. It is a very lonely feeling to go through life this way. That’s one reason that I’m so thankful for my online friends because they seem to have the ability to see the real me and my words are valued–with these people, I feel understood and as if my voice is actually heard. So, a great big thank you to my online friends!
I now have another journey to face and that is the journey back to my house on the opposite side of the country. Once again, I suspect that we will have to be in “get there ” mode and there will be no opportunity to just slow down and enjoy the journey. And while you might think that would be a great opportunity to make my voice heard, that won’t be the case because I would probably still feel that my voice continues to go unheard and my words are both misunderstood and undervalued. Being quiet is difficult for me because I am a very chatty and social person, and I place great value on words. Words are powerful and I often think we don’t realize that as much as we should.
I am not looking forward to my next upcoming journey, but I am looking forward to getting back to my sewing room, some much needed (and long overdue) sewing and fabric therapy.
Happy Sewing!
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